Love Body Language
Guides and interpretations of love body language are everywhere, and I must confess that I read them every once in awhile, even at age 62.
Most to the main stream treatments are designed to separate you from your money.
Folks, it takes two to communicate love body language, and just because you have read the latest book or article, and have faithfully practiced the techniques described at your bathroom mirror, you are not guaranteed anymore mating success than the guy or girl who has never heard of body language or tried to manipulate body language.
In fact, the individual who gets my nod in the attraction game is the individual who knows how to listen and ask perceptive questions.
Those attributes, which means that he or she is choosing to pay attention, is very flattering to me, and I like to express my thanks for that attention right off the bat, and then launch into my discourse.
However, I need to watch for the eyes glazing over signal that I have gone on too long and shut myself up at that point.
So Who Do the Love Body Language Professionals Look to for Answers?
I start with Helen Fisher,Ph.D. and Paul Ekman,Ph.D. Professor Fisher has studied mating rituals for around 30 years, and can walk into a coffee shop or saloon and point them out as men and women demonstrate them, and Professor Ekman's work on recognizing facial expressions is profound and I like to add in some information from Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi's book FLOW about how fast our physiology changes in response to subtle changes in tone of voice and facial expressions.
With Ekman, Fisher, and Czikszentmihalyi, you are not going to get your garden variety, subscription boosting interpretation of love body language, you are going to get something much more valuable, knowledge, and when you have knowledge you can enrich the world around you, rather than manipulate it for your own sexual gratification.
I have used aspects of Ekman's work in my domestic violence groups for years, because I want my clients to become more aware of their feelings, and how fast those feelings change based on their response to facial expressions, and I want them to know that response goes all the way back to attachment behaviors demonstrated by moms and dads when they were infants.
So paying attention to the love body language or the lack of it will be helpful in establishing a relationship with the object of your attention, and since the changes in communication and rituals are subtle and done fast, perhaps you will need to learn how to pay attention much better than you do currently.
A wonderful attention training tool is the Mind Sparke Brain Fitness Pro which will train your attention and memory with a side effect of increased IQ. I suggest you try it, and then learn how to do reflective listening, and then read Professor Fisher's work linked to above.
If you are interested in a dating site which is based on Dr. Fisher's work, designed to help you find a compatible partner, then check out Chemistry.com
Would You Share What You Are Most Grateful For?
Very early in my personal growth experience, a wise person taught me to use the phrase "gratitude is the attitude" when I was resentful or afraid and that phrase has helped me feel better tens of thousands of times.